Random Quote

"If my heart is broken, I should be thankful that I was blessed to have loved... but I cannot live that wisely. That’s why I cry"

But I love Bok Choy

A few days ago, some friends and I were talking about the HRC’s Equality Index. In the latest survey taken in 2007, some of the more popular stores had these scores: Federated Department Stores (this includes Macy, Bloomingdales, etc) (100%), Sears/Kmart (100%), Target Corporation (80%), and Wal-Mart (40%). For me, Wal-Mart’s scores were the most surprising. Considering all the accounts of their use of child labour, illegal immigrants and their predatory measures against smaller mom and pop grocery stores, I expected them to be rated lower. I don’t really know too well the details of this survey so I can’t comment more on what went into these figures. Meijer, a grocery store that most of us in the discussion use scored 0%. One of the guys in the group who feels really strongly about this issue was encouraging (read: pushing) all of us to try to use alternate sources.

Personally, I prefer to shop at Meijer. Being the vegetarian and fruitarian that I am, on a weekly basis, I mostly buy fruit and produce. For these purposes, I find that Meijer is the best option. Wal-Mart may be cheaper but their fruit and produce department is horrible (not so for Sam’s Club which is the Wal-Mart bulk store, can’t explain why). Plus, I have bigger issues with Wal-Mart way beyond their HRC Equality index.

Anyway, this HRC advocate was recommending ALDI, which is a small little known discount supermarket (yes, it is exactly what it sounds like). ALDI, however being what it is, doesn’t have too much variety going for it. As one friend put it, “they don’t have Bok Choy.” This statement was hilarious to me for a lot of reasons, especially after we had established that this friend never really eats fruits and veggies, and produce in general but particularly not Bok Choy. But as he clarified, “I like having the option to not have it.”

It is the same way with a lot of things in life though. There are some things that we definitely do not want. There are things we would throw away if given them, but we still want to be offered these things, if only so we can refuse them. Like me being disappointed that my gay friends decided to only throw their boa to the single males at their wedding. I have been to numerous weddings where I have refused to stand to catch the bouquet. But at least it was my choice not to. Or being disappointed that some unappealing, unattractive guy isn't interested in me. I know I would turn him down. But I do mind that he didn't ask me in the first place. Or other such crazy things.

Hmm, I really don’t know where I was going with that story. Maybe I simply want to give you the option to not read this posting. :-)

Deeply Profound Thought

OK, everyone hold your breath for this one:

So yesterday, as I was going along with my day, thinking mind boggling and life changing thoughts; thoughts for which I someday (pretty soon, please God!) hope to get a really advanced degree which will allow me to put on some extra pretenses, and go around with my head held high, with the all knowing look of someone who knows more that you do (ok, I digress, but stick with me please), I had a revolutionary thought.

I spend more time with my colleagues at work/school than most married couples spend together (awake or asleep), everyday, every week. So under common law in some places, (The details of such laws currently elude me. If I am motivated later, maybe I will look it up.) we are (wait for this) MARRIED!

This is how I see it. These common law marriage laws indicate that if a couple (probably only applies to straights at this time, but last I checked, there aren’t any women in my lab so there!) lives together for more that three or it is seven years (doesn’t really matter, we can work to modify these laws later), they are technically married. And so since I spend so much time with these guys here at work, I am married to each one of them.

So this is the plan. There is nothing like common law divorce. I know. Apparently, I can’t simply just stay away from work for a couple of years and claim divorce rights. Who would have thought! But that little detail won't stop on my way to achieving greatness. I am going to go out and get a divorce (the real way) from all of these guys. One after the other, all ten of them, so I can claim alimony from each of them. You may wonder, why all ten of them? I will enlighten you (Oh you non-deeply profound thoughts thinking person). They are graduate students, that is why. I will need the support from all ten of them if I can achieve the oh so lavish lifestyle I am envisioning right afterwards.

And that little detail of how I may have committed polyandry? Yes, I did look into that. Since it was through no fault of mine that I was put into this situation, of being forced to marry (I mean work) with these guys, I am OK. I am actually also looking into suing my boss for forceful arranged polyandry. That should add nicely to the treasure trove.

Now why no one ever thought of this wonderful idea is beyond me. Must be the same people who haven't thought of our pets owning their own pets or chocolate cover vegetables.

OK, you can let your breath out now. And come out celebrate with me in anticipation of all the riches I will make from my divorce settlements. Go ahead, have a drink on me. I can afford it (in the near future that is). Yay!

Coming up: Your (highly sporadic) regularly scheduled blogging (involving no such Deeply Profound Thoughts).

Random Quote

Because I don't have time for a real post:

I guess I have just gotten really good at sugar coating turd.

The big guy himself.

On making level B journal results sound like a level A journal results.

Random quote 2

Is caesium poisonous? I think I spilt some in my mouth.

Another frustrated colleague.

How you accidentally spill a chemical in your mouth, I do not know. Good thing it wasn't really ceasium, and he didn't really spill. I love the guys I work with. Most days.

Random Quote 1

Spectra (and data) are so over rated. What ever happened to blind faith?
---------------------------------------------------------------- Frustrated colleague.

I know exactly how he felt. In a sense though, it does take a lot of faith to trust all the different data sources and analytical tools that we use daily. The irony is that few scientists will admit to having faith.